Oscars

Okay. Here we are, as promised.

My girl Melissa didn't win. Okay. I accept that. I still love her so much. Meryl won, deservedly so. The hot French guy won, and without seeing the movie I can tell you I'd vote for him.

Clooney was fairly convinced he was going to win, I think. After The Artist and Midnight in Paris and the look on his face during that whole Cirque thing, his next girlfriend is going to come straight from Paree. Mark my words.

Billy was funny. It's the appropriate level of funny for the Oscars. It's the biggest night of the year for the most fragile group of people on the planet, and as hard as I prayed for a meltdown it didn't happen. I think Rooney Mara takes herself far too seriously, and having looked again at her facial expression after she lost to Meryl Fucking Streep... you know what? I'll stop there. Put in your time, kid, and take some notes. People want to like you, you did a good job. But you didn't win. Back to work.

I've read several times today that this is considered the worst Oscars ever. Eh, I don't think so. It was nice to see Billy again, everybody who should be there was there (Brad & Angelina & George & GeorgeGirlfriend (sorry, Stacey, but that's life) & Paltrow & RD Jr. & Spielberg & most certainly Tom Hanks). It was like old times.

If it sucked, it's because overall, awards shows suck. It's not because of the direction of the telecast, or the actors, or the films themselves. It's because the very act of attempting to choose the very best of a group of things that don't have anything in common (other than the fact that they're films) is SO subjective, it's impossible to do. It's not a footrace. The most deserving winner is not always clear. Ask George.

This is the biggest night of the year for the industry, for film buffs, for starfuckers, for a hell of a lot of people, and the Academy never, ever, ever gets it right. You can blame the f-bomb or the accountants or the jolly ladies who run around the red carpet or Ryan Seacrest or whoever the hell, I don't know. But I'm telling you, that no one's ever happy with the Oscars because no one's ever happy with who the Academy chose. So they blame something stupid. I do the same thing. Granted, I didn't mind last night's Oscars, but that's because of some of the actors and my God it looked like some of them (the cast of Bridesmaids, Zack, Will Ferrell, Robert Downey Jr., etc.) were having fun.

Eh, whatever. Done for another year, anyway, and this time in 2013, I'll be even further behind in viewing Oscar nominated films. I didn't watch a single nominated movie. Not one.

Life goes on.